Chapter 13: MERCY FUCK (no, I didn't forget this one)

CHAPTER: 13 MERCY FUCK

SHOULD I MERCY FUCK THE BABY’s BIO FATHER. I don’t care how horny you might be and you will be after a year of NO SEX, you should definitely consider NOT seeing the baby’s father and especially if you are just going to hook –up for free sex, that is you do it all, provide the location, condoms and even food after. NO WAY, first of all be careful you might get pregnant again and second why would you let a truck that just ran you over on the freeway, run you over twice?  Unless you are training to be a character in Tarantino’s next movie. I mean come on you are already dead, so why let them kill you twice, you never win in those cases, they do. Next time you even consider having his dick up your pussy think about when was the last time you got a check from the guy, when was the last time you got a child support update/statement?

The biological father of your child contacts you after a year of you coping with your son and doing all of it on your own, cause he misses you and even the baby, what do you know? Just IGNORE him, ya, you might be ridden with guilt thinking what am I doing to the future of my child. But in reality you are doing him a favor cause most likely if he has treated you this badly and show indifference to such a degree that he doesn’t even bother to see your son at least once a month, then what makes you think he will show-up for your son’s first day of school, or soccer game or even college graduation. Tell him to go fuck-off, and ask him where he was when his son was super sick and vomiting and having diarrhea attacks all at the same time, I mean where was he to help clean up that mess and make sure your son was o.k. and not freaked-out about it all. Where was he every time you needed to go get shots for the baby and had to wait soooo long in line and then in the waiting room and then in the actual examining room and handle your child’s impatience and then pain and more importantly your pain at seeing him suffer so much and having no shoulder to cry on or anyone to help carry some of the baby crap. Just think of the times you left him with his unofficial godmother when you had  to go on business trips in other cities and he got sick, and you called and begged him- when he still had a cellphone, or at least was able to pay for it- to go see your son, afterall his flesh and blood, and he never showed up or answered your call… that fact alone always fuels me up with anger and disdain.

Invest in a good vibrator, that won't break and pick-up some AA batteries when you are at IKEA, so you don't run-out on a Saturday night.  Believe me, I'm a November 2nd Scorpio, we are ruled by our genitalia and known to be horny ALL THE TIME, but please wait until you are ready to jump into another relationship or bed with some guy, but definitely do not hurt yourself or kid yourself with the bio father thinking now he is going to stay with you for good, no, he's coming to gas up only and then hitting the freeway again. He only comes around for the fun times, for the crazy parties, when you are buying dinner for the five millionth time or when you are invited to a after party with an open bar and an endless supply of Pacifico beer or whatever they have in the keg. 

Give yourself time to heal, and also know that it's o.k. to be alone and you will be fine, you also deserve better, so go get yourself a massage.